How To Date a White Woman: A Practical Guide For Asian Men
Every once in a while a book comes along that seems like it was written specifically for me. Actually, that never happens. But then I heard about How to Date a White Woman: A Practical Guide For Asian Men. And that, my friends, is a book with “Hung Truong” written all over it! I first heard about it from my internet pals JP Meyer and Maria via their Google Reader shared feeds. After seeing the cover and reading the title, I knew I had to get this book. I promptly ordered the thing from a third party Amazon seller for whatever crazy high price it was. It was completely worth it.
I didn’t get the book to improve my white woman dating skills, but rather to try and get into the mind of an Asian guy who would write such a book (I am already dating a white woman, fairly successfully). The book is written by Adam Quan, who is apparently “an International Business Consultant” who has “successfully dated women of many nationalities.” The book has a little bit of everything, from a theory on why white guys have more luck with Asian girls versus Asian guys and white girls, to detailed statistics on divorce rates and even score sheets for keeping track of your white woman dating progress. I am not making any of this up!
One of the best parts of the book is the inclusion of Asian grammars. There are countless grammar and spelling mistakes sprinkled here and there. It helps to read the book in the voice of a grumpy old Asian male. Here’s an example:
The image you projected to the white woman is the very core of your dating strategy. To date successfully, often you must become knowledgeable about the white woman in question. Find out what ticks her.
Unfortunately (for anyone reading the book seriously), the advice doesn’t really seem all that helpful. The author suggests that to compensate for being tiny, Asian men should work out to increase their physical size. Another section heading is titled “Avoid Losers.” Yet the book sorta forgets to include some common knowledge about dating, like calling the girl the day after a date, etc. The process that the book suggests seems a bit too structured and analytical. I guess it could help to keep a journal, but should Asian men really be keeping track of their current “points,” gain/loss velocity and possible competition after each date!? It’s pretty apparent that a businessman wrote this.
Another distressing thing about the book is its fairly misogynistic tone. For one thing, it treats women as objects, often referring to them as “targets” and the reader as a “hunter.” It portrays the submissive Asian woman stereotype and flips that around to conclude that white women are focused on being headstrong individuals. This is not to say that I didn’t find the book to be extremely entertaining. But there were quite a few parts that had me scratching my head and wondering about those who would take it seriously. I kind of feel bad for the Asian guys who need this book and end up taking its advice.
Overall, the book is quite useless for its intended purpose. For unintentional humor, this book rates very high. If I weren’t already dating a white woman and wanted to bag one, I think it’d also be great as a prop. Just take this to the nearest Starbucks (or wherever white women gather in your area) and pretend to be studying it closely. It’ll definitely be more useful as a conversation starter than a reference book.
My advice: be yourself. Be genuine. Really listen. Oh, and really do work out to compensate for your wimpy Asian physique. Wii Fit seems to work well for me.
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Hung, I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time! I would definitely buy this book for my brother for Christmas if it weren’t for the fact that A) He is already married to a white woman and B) I fear that increased book sales would spur the author into writing a follow-up.
Maybe your brother should write a book!
Hey everyone, greetings from Denmark. This is a nice site. I’m wondering if you have any advice on staying out of the friend zone with girls? Honestly I’m sick of girls telling me they just want to be friends. Perhaps I’m being too nice?
Sawada, many guys are jumping on the alpha male bandwagon……which has at its heart the belief that you can’t be a doormat with women. You can’t try to win their heart by being sweet and helpful and generous per se (these are all good, but not the trick). You gotta work on your self-confidence, your passion in life and in the things you believe in or do, the way you present yourself (body language, dressing, physique and voice projection), your sense of humour and I suppose, the dark arts of what turn women on (how to maintain sexual tension). So, it’s a lot of self-improvement, coupled with psychology and quite a lot of basic common sense. It does turn conventional thought on how to chase women on its head – convention being to get a chick, you buy her gifts and bring her to fancy restaurants etc – which is basically you trying to impress the chick with your spending power…………or by being the good friend. The guy who makes her chicken soup when she’s sick, who takes notes for her at lectures she misses, who picks her up from the mall etc………..the guy who does everything but sleep with her because you’re as sexy as a hamster. There’s no sexual tension. There’s a lot of focus on not appearing to be too interested – sorta like the male version of playing hard to get. I believe some of these theories make sense, and its wise to focus on improving oneself and not obsessing about women and how after you do this, women will naturally come. It’s sorta like the Spanish national soccer team – they sometimes play almost like they don’t wanna win – they seem to enjoy playing soccer for soccer’s sake……….and most times, they end up winning. Similarly, if you stop obsessing about the girl, you have more time to devote on your career, relationships, hobbies etc and end up becoming a more attractive guy. A guy who’s got his life sorted, who lives with a passion and who’s infectiously awesome and positive is super attractive. Still, I really think that you need wisdom as well………to pick the right girl, and to know what to do to maintain the attraction after the initial score. I’m assuming you’re looking for something long term, eventually (after you’ve gotten your kicks off)……….which is when you need to realise how much Jesus loves you. When you start to be in a close relationship with God, that’s when the magic happens. That’s when we really start talking – meeting an awesome chick who thinks you’re divine is only one of the many many things that will then come your way.
Sawada, I once was a nice guy. I got stuck in the friend zone. Here’s the best advice I can give you that is tested and true. What you need to do, is to be a jerk…playfully. Don’t overdo it: for example, when I first met a new girl at my work, I’d say, “Hey stop slacking off” and she’d laugh and say, “whatever!” But then, you be nice to her once in awhile. “I’m gonna grab a coffee, you want one?” Be a playful jerk. That’s what I’ve learned. Build upon that.
the last part is funny, Oh, and really do work out to compensate for your wimpy Asian physique. Wii Fit seems to work well for me. hilarious. and i don’t know if you have checked out the bit review bookfall wrote on this book.it saying: According to Amazon.com, 14% of customers who view this book, buy the video game Civilization IV instead. I guess playing video games and not dating white women go hand in hand. i know this book on a buzz site,lucky enough,me myself,already dating a white girl.but little searching progress really are entertaining.
I’ve been out to clubs in just 2 wks and have talked to 7 hot white girls and spent time wit them How?.. Being asian seems more difficult due to stereotypes but it didnt stop me.. I initiated wit buying them drinks and completely show True Dominance. I show that im like a leader of the social scene.. I find flaws from girls and playfully tease them.. Hundreds of guys give compliments to them all nite so I want to b different by Playfully teasing them.. Teasing girls is one of my strongest traits. Together wit her, I tease about other People just to have a fun conversation. I asked silly questions and gave silly Answers. I have an “i dont care” attitude b/c if these girls reject me, i’ll immediately talk to more girls.. I spend $$ on their drinks and display my dominance over other wimpy guys.. I act like a sugar daddy at times, providing that Sense of support that they can depend.. Although I initiated the conversation Wit women, I never pursue or chase after them.. If I chase after, they’ll immediately Lose interest and I lose my dominance.. Wat I found funny is that im under 5 feet 7 and could talk to any white Chicks in length.. Yet other 5’11 or 6 feet blk or white dudes seem clueless at: how the hell this lil asian kid get girls Interested?.. Ray ray. P.s: I often hang out wit my wing man (black guy) and that helps destroy some Asian stereotypes as we hang out wit white gals in clubs, beaches, etc..